Article 19: Causes and Coping Strategies for Irritability and Self-Isolation

11. Irritability

A scientist discovered that when a person's exhaled breath is placed in a liquid, the liquid shows no significant change when the person is calm; however, a white precipitate forms when the person is sad, and the liquid becomes cloudy when the person is angry. Further experiments revealed that the secretions produced when a person is angry can even poison a mouse. He also calculated that 10 minutes of anger consumes energy equivalent to running a 3000-meter race. Therefore, the scientist concluded that people largely do not die of old age, but rather from anger. This clearly demonstrates the immense importance of maintaining a healthy mental state!

Adjustment

Learn patience and tolerance. A magnanimous attitude in the face of adversity can quell anger and transform it into peace. By learning to forgive, and abandoning resentment and punishment, you will find that removing the burden of anger from your shoulders will help you control impulsive actions.

Acknowledge the problem and stay clear-headed. Tell your spouse and close friends and family that you acknowledge your past tendency to lose your temper and are determined to improve in the future. Ask for their support, cooperation, and encouragement; this will help you gradually achieve your goal. When angry thoughts are churning in your mind, remind yourself to remain rational so you can avoid short-sightedness and regain foresight.

Don't suppress your anger. Suppressing yourself to avoid conflict is like a time bomb; eventually, your emotions will spiral out of control and explode uncontrollably.

Express anger, but react appropriately. Sometimes, anger is the healthiest way to vent; expressing your emotions appropriately can relieve psychological stress. Any normal person would be furious when subjected to cruel abuse. However, no matter what happened, do not resort to verbal abuse. Instead, calmly and without prejudice explain to the other person where their words and actions were wrong and why. This approach gives the other person an opportunity to change their ways without being harmed.

Take a short break and relax amidst your busy schedule. When you're angry, take a moment to pause, breathe deeply, and relax your muscles. This can help control your emotions, help you understand the cause of your anger, and prevent things from escalating. If you become irritable and angry due to a busy life, allow yourself a short break to calm down before facing the situation again.

12. Self-isolation mentality

Self-isolation refers to a psychological state in which one closes off their inner world, is unwilling to communicate with the outside world, and is unwilling to establish close relationships with others. This mentality can gradually lead to social isolation and a loss of the ability to interact with others.

Adjustment

Accept yourself. Are there really so many troubles in life? Many things are not a big deal; we just magnify them.

Learn to tell yourself "It's okay," and your life will often be filled with laughter.

Don't dwell on unpleasant past events, and don't bear the burden of mistakes that aren't yours.

Discovering your strengths will boost your confidence and enhance your communication skills.

Don't "imprison yourself," as this will only close your eyes and ears, narrow your thinking, slow your actions, and make you useless.

Live life naturally.

Don't hide your true feelings. If you're about to part with your closest friend, let the tears flow. Holding back tears out of fear of gossip will only increase your psychological burden.

Social training program

Early stage

Try going to a public place every day, such as taking a bus, going to a bookstore, or going to a park. Spend some time there, guiding yourself to be interested in the people and things in your surroundings, and then go home and record everything you observe. If you're afraid of crowded places at first, start with less crowded or deserted environments. Also, follow the principle of gradually increasing the time you spend outside.

Mid-term

Read books and articles on basic communication skills, such as how to greet people, how to start a conversation, and polite conversation etiquette.

Go to a market and inquire about the prices of vegetables.

Asking strangers for directions on the street, including asking older, younger, and younger people of the same or opposite sex. In particular, make sure to ask a young, handsome, and attractive person of the opposite sex for directions once and a person who doesn't seem friendly once.

Buy an item, then return it. Whether you succeed in returning it or not is irrelevant; what matters is that you dare to and are able to state your reasons to the store.

Note: After completing each step above, write down your reflections, analyze how well you applied the communication skills you learned, and summarize your strengths and weaknesses. For your strengths, maintain them in future actions, and for your weaknesses, correct them through further "supplementary practice" until they are largely overcome.

Later

Ask a colleague a business-related question about the company every day until the second week.

Initially, choose to ask questions of colleagues who are relatively easygoing and tolerant (such as older colleagues), and then ask those who seem less agreeable or difficult to approach. When asking questions, approach them with a humble attitude and listen attentively. Maintain eye contact with the person frequently (but not staring intently), and respond appropriately (such as nodding to indicate understanding). If possible, find someone approachable and patient to guide you.

During your free time at work, take the initiative to participate in your colleagues' conversations. You may not be very good at speaking at first, but that's okay. You just need to listen patiently.

After some time, you can also share your own insights at the appropriate time. To make yourself more successful, you should "prepare for battle," such as watching a ball game the night before or jotting down an interesting example from a newspaper so you can use it in conversation the next day.

Invite your colleagues to go shopping, have a casual meal, or see an exhibition.

I hope you can complete this training process. By then, you will be free from loneliness, expand your social circle, and find happiness.